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Share the God, Spoil the Child

Share the God, Spoil the Child

by Adam on September 23, 2014 at 12:00 am
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Discussion (23) ¬

  1. Ultimate Yes America 6-5000: The Movie
    Ultimate Yes America 6-5000: The Movie
    September 23, 2014, 12:28 am | # | Reply

    I never considered the bible as being with ‘spoilers’. I always felt it was universally known, like the stories and such. Now I feel so rude…

  2. TaishiEA
    TaishiEA
    September 23, 2014, 12:50 am | # | Reply

    doesn’t everyone die in the bible?

    • RAAAH
      RAAAH
      September 23, 2014, 1:56 am | # | Reply

      Well there are your possible Sean Bean roles for A Game of Gospels.

      • Hauke
        Hauke
        September 23, 2014, 2:02 am | # | Reply

        The gospels according to George, Raymond, Richard and Martin.

    • JXJ
      JXJ
      September 23, 2014, 2:45 am | # | Reply

      Well, the bible takes place over a few thousand years, so yes, almost everyone dies.

    • Wyrmspawn
      Wyrmspawn
      September 23, 2014, 10:04 am | # | Reply

      Actually no. There is one or two direct ascensions to heaven.

      • Jeff Clough
        Jeff Clough
        September 23, 2014, 8:32 pm | # | Reply

        Actually, just the one.

        • Kent
          Kent
          September 24, 2014, 12:34 am | # | Reply

          There’s Elijah, Enoch (his is a bit ambiguous maybe), and Jesus (though he did die before).

  3. KJ
    KJ
    September 23, 2014, 1:03 am | # | Reply

    The Book of Revelations – A chapter that’s practically just about spoilers!

  4. RAAAH
    RAAAH
    September 23, 2014, 2:00 am | # | Reply

    Panel 2: HA! I raise you Moses book 2, or as I like to call it: The Forbiddering! Basically you need to burn helpless animals on a 24/7 basis or you are stained for the rest of eternity, oh and did I mention that burning animals is also staining? So you better find yourself some proxy burners!

    • RAAAH
      RAAAH
      September 23, 2014, 2:01 am | # | Reply

      Ah crap it’s book 3…….there you go next goat.

    • RAAAH
      RAAAH
      September 23, 2014, 2:19 am | # | Reply

      Ah when I am already at it, basically the bible is the grandfather of 9gag, first you have those stupid stories that vary in the ranges of poker face incest, like a boss exodus, insanity wolf genocide and malicious advice a mallard rules. That is already pretty weird and leaves you as a socially awkward penguin, but then comes the whole awkward seal stuff and the actual advice mallard psalms that degrade into senselessness. Then the old testament goes full retard and you get to the comment section that is full of spite and nerd rage.

      Then comes the new testament and it starts of with 1 OP and 3 reposts and again, a terribly long comment section about those reposts only to quit with the largest nerd rage fanfic in history.

  5. The Mattness
    The Mattness
    September 23, 2014, 6:45 am | # | Reply

    I’ve been working on a more…. readable Bible just for fun (because it IS a lot of fun–ESPECIALLY the illustrations) and I’m in Leviticus now. It feels like most of what I’ve been doing is The Adventures of Moses. I’m not a believer, mind you, but I’m as careful as I can be to give respect to the source material, however befuddled and self-contradictory it may be.

    I love it when you do the Bug God strips, and though we don’t see Him here, I for one know the Bug God abides. :p

  6. The Mattness
    The Mattness
    September 23, 2014, 6:47 am | # | Reply

    Sorry–I’m in Numbers now. It’s not quite as fun as Exodus, but when I finally get to Revelation, it’s all gonna be worth it.

    • Zed
      Zed
      September 23, 2014, 8:00 am | # | Reply

      Can you show/share the part with all of the begetting in it?

      • The Mattness
        The Mattness
        September 23, 2014, 8:39 am | # | Reply

        I do actually have a Cain and Abel chart.
        I didn’t, however, draw the act of the begettin’. Not really into that kinda thing, and there’s a rather uncomfortable Song of Solomon coming up that’ll be more than enough of it. :p Here’s a link to an imgur album of some of the illustrations:
        http://imgur.com/a/ylsCW

  7. The Mattness
    The Mattness
    September 23, 2014, 8:38 am | # | Reply

    I do actually have a Cain and Abel chart.

    I didn’t, however, draw the act of the begettin’. Not really into that kinda thing, and there’s a rather uncomfortable Song of Solomon coming up that’ll be more than enough of it. :p Here’s a link to an imgur album of some of the illustrations:

    http://imgur.com/a/ylsCW

  8. Andrew
    Andrew
    September 23, 2014, 9:20 am | # | Reply

    I think that last frame should read “crucifixes” instead of “crucifixions.”

    • Adam
      Adam
      September 23, 2014, 5:56 pm | # | Reply

      Yeah, that works much better. Why did that word elude me? I’ll make the change.

      • Andrew
        Andrew
        September 24, 2014, 8:34 am | # | Reply

        Awesome. Thanks for the fun comic.

  9. Mahnarch
    Mahnarch
    September 23, 2014, 12:50 pm | # | Reply

    None of those shenanigans?
    That’s a load of malarkey, I tells ya!

  10. Darth Litarius
    Darth Litarius
    September 23, 2014, 6:18 pm | # | Reply

    I’ve always thought the Bible would be more compelling if you read it in order. I heard of a missionary doing it once and he had his audience hooked.

  11. Andy
    Andy
    September 23, 2014, 8:44 pm | # | Reply

    The cat came back. He just wouldn’t stay away.

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