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A Man of Few Passwords

A Man of Few Passwords

by Adam on November 17, 2015 at 12:00 am
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Discussion (30) ¬

  1. Dragon352
    Dragon352
    November 17, 2015, 12:39 am | # | Reply

    good thing I dont need a password to comment on this
    (how many other people were going to say this?..)

  2. DawnPaladin
    DawnPaladin
    November 17, 2015, 1:45 am | # | Reply

    Sounds like you need a password manager! You should sign up for LastPass–it takes care of all that for you. Been a happy customer of theirs for years now.

    • Rena
      Rena
      November 19, 2015, 5:17 pm | # | Reply

      Or get a database like KeePass so that only you have them…

  3. Bruno
    Bruno
    November 17, 2015, 2:04 am | # | Reply

    Or some cheesy joke along the line of “passed away”.

  4. bd
    bd
    November 17, 2015, 2:28 am | # | Reply

    Coroner Bug? You couldn’t cast Linda Fiorentino as the Medical Examiner?

  5. Mahnarch
    Mahnarch
    November 17, 2015, 5:58 am | # | Reply

    Everyone who comes to your funeral will have to create a new user name and password just to leave a comment at your casket.

  6. joecrouse
    joecrouse
    November 17, 2015, 7:13 am | # | Reply

    Passwords are not difficult. I fail to see how people can not remember a simple 8 or 10 digit alphanumeric with a special character

    People can still remember phone numbers right? an alpha numeric is about as complex as a phone number to remember

    • AZHBUG
      AZHBUG
      November 17, 2015, 7:38 am | # | Reply

      sure, most people remember (some) phone numbers – but they use far fewer phone numbers from memory than they use websites which require a login/password. Most people nowadays would remember fewer than 5 phone numbers – I remember my mobile, my wife’s mobile, my work number and my mother’s home number, and for some odd reason the number for the BBS I ran for almost 10 years. Lots of people have trouble remembering even their own phone number; many people have an entry in their mobile phone which reads “my number”. Ask around.

      • Majdan
        Majdan
        November 17, 2015, 8:00 am | # | Reply

        Um, I would think EVERYONE has an entry in their mobile phone with their phone number. It’s in the setup menu.

      • joecrouse
        joecrouse
        November 17, 2015, 12:22 pm | # | Reply

        dont see the problem I have 9 work passwords (currently) and a dozen personal its not hard.

        • wilson
          wilson
          November 17, 2015, 3:46 pm | # | Reply

          If you have that few passwords, you either do almost nothing on the internet, or you repeat passwords between sites, which means you’re making the security of all accounts that share a password equal to the lowest level of security of those accounts (and depending on exactly what it is, possibly exposing other passwords as well through reset mechanisms and personal data). I have dozens of personal passwords, and more than a hundred work ones, and they are all unique pseudo-random strings, thanks to a password manager, and now whenever podunk web service gets its database hacked, it doesn’t compromise all the other sites that I would otherwise have used that same password with.

        • Wraj
          Wraj
          November 18, 2015, 11:47 am | # | Reply

          You are also failing to take into account that you should change your passwords regularly. Work passwords, for me, have lasted between 24 hours and 3 months.

  7. John Vogel
    John Vogel
    November 17, 2015, 8:10 am | # | Reply

    Adam, you forgot the other annoying part of creating new accounts: getting new emails from those new accounts. My inbox is full of spam from things I actually signed up for.

    • Mahnarch
      Mahnarch
      November 18, 2015, 8:16 am | # | Reply

      And the third parties that they sell your info to.

      AND, when you try to unsubscribe to those sites, they sell your info out of spite (and profit). 🙁

  8. Marquar
    Marquar
    November 17, 2015, 9:21 am | # | Reply

    It is not the remembering that is the issue, but finding a password that passes their byzantine rules.

    Password must be between 8 and 12 characters.
    Password must have upper and lowercase symbols, numbers, Cyrillic letters, Egyptian hieroglyphics, and the dot code from the movie Symbols.
    Password may not contain your user name, words, or entries from the Necromomicon.
    Password may not summon an Elder God.

    • joecrouse
      joecrouse
      November 17, 2015, 12:27 pm | # | Reply

      8-10 characters
      3 of 4 characteristicts or all 4 characteristics
      Upper case letter
      Special Character
      lower case letters
      numbers
      Its very very simple.
      Special characters not allowed @ ! and *
      are the usual disallowed characters. * because it denotes wild cards ! because its to common and @ because its used in an Email which is not allowed, User Names not allowed (because DUH jcrouse1234 user name password Jcrouse1234 isnt secure) Proper names not allowed because dictionary attack. Its actually bloody simple.

      • Matthew
        Matthew
        November 17, 2015, 2:38 pm | # | Reply

        Joe, it’s obviously a joke here. Did you forget to log in to your sense of humor there?

        Also, apparently not everybody can effortlessly remember ten to twelve unique passwords so they need to write them down.

        • wilson
          wilson
          November 17, 2015, 3:47 pm | # | Reply

          Or use a password manager!

    • tlh-in-tlh
      tlh-in-tlh
      November 17, 2015, 3:15 pm | # | Reply

      I have difficulty with that last one. “NO, I AM *NOT* ATTEMPTING TO SUMMON YOU! BACK TO THE PIT!! I MEAN IT!!!”

  9. l
    l
    November 17, 2015, 10:52 am | # | Reply

    And these days getting a pet is harder since they become your default password. Cant have kitty or spot any more. Need to be more – yhgt4567!

    • Silly Name
      Silly Name
      November 17, 2015, 11:24 am | # | Reply

      Personally, I’ve decided to name all my future pets Spot’); DROP TABLE Users;–

      • BugFanNo1Million
        BugFanNo1Million
        November 17, 2015, 2:56 pm | # | Reply

        But then the nickname might become Spotty Tables …

  10. GuesssWho
    GuesssWho
    November 17, 2015, 11:07 am | # | Reply

    I have three passwords, because at this point I’d rather be hacked than have to remember another one *Sigh*

    • Mahnarch
      Mahnarch
      November 18, 2015, 8:25 am | # | Reply

      Whoever steals my info will get a BIG surprise if they ever go to the hospital (when they break out all the probes that go up your no-no).

      That’s the only funny thing I can think of about having Severe Crohns. 😀

  11. turquoisecow
    turquoisecow
    November 17, 2015, 3:32 pm | # | Reply

    Ugh, yes. Every job I apply for, the company wants me to create a profile, username, password. Can’t I just send my resume and cover letter and move on??

  12. Dimentio
    Dimentio
    November 17, 2015, 4:23 pm | # | Reply

    I use the same username and password for everything, that way I don’t have to do much remembering.

    • GuesssWho
      GuesssWho
      November 19, 2015, 4:23 pm | # | Reply

      This

  13. Ian Osmond
    Ian Osmond
    November 18, 2015, 7:49 am | # | Reply

    My wife has one arbitrary password that is random that she remembers. And then, she’s got this thing she does with the URL, I don’t know what it is, but she takes the random password, and does this thing with the URL that changes the random password somehow — adds a character in the middle or something like that — and THAT’S her password for THAT site. So every site has a different password, but she only has to remember one random thing and one rule.

    I don’t know what her random password is, or what her rule is, though, because we don’t share passwords. But that’s an idea for people — come up with one password that follows the general rules of secure passwords, and modify it based on the site, so that they’re different per, but it’s not obvious how, but you can remember it.

    I don’t know what happens if the site in question changes their URL, though…

    • Mahnarch
      Mahnarch
      November 18, 2015, 8:28 am | # | Reply

      That’s pretty brilliant.
      It also breaks a dictionary word into a non-dictionary word.

  14. Karine76
    Karine76
    November 18, 2015, 7:25 pm | # | Reply

    iGuffawed at panel 2.

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