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Old Gray Jesus, He Ain’t What He Used to Be

Old Gray Jesus, He Ain’t What He Used to Be

by Adam on November 9, 2011 at 12:00 am
Chapter: comics
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Discussion (49) ¬

  1. Tom
    Tom
    November 9, 2011, 12:04 am | # | Reply

    xD I like the idea!
    And three years would be a long time to resurrect o.o He’d probably be really bored during that time period 😛

  2. jaymz42
    jaymz42
    November 9, 2011, 12:08 am | # | Reply

    Poor Jesus 😛

  3. Rhea
    Rhea
    November 9, 2011, 12:17 am | # | Reply

    Adam, you’re going straight to hell. I’ll be glad to see you there; you’ll make it a much funnier place.

    Panel 4 is a hoot, but shouldn’t panel 2 be the other way round?

  4. ninelen
    ninelen
    November 9, 2011, 1:19 am | # | Reply

    Oh, the blasphemy. I love it.

    And Rhea’s right, Adam won’t be all by himself in hell. My handbasket is already hand-decorated.

    Stenciled flowers, glitter, and panda stickers. I be pimpin’.

  5. Fabrael
    Fabrael
    November 9, 2011, 1:51 am | # | Reply

    This is one of those ‘only in bug’ comics. You don’t get awesomeness like this anywhere else.

  6. TB Tabby
    TB Tabby
    November 9, 2011, 1:51 am | # | Reply

    It’s much worse than that. These days, all he seems to be able to manage is making his face appear on a grilled cheese sandwich.

  7. Adrian
    Adrian
    November 9, 2011, 1:57 am | # | Reply

    panel three made me spit my morning coffee onto my laptop screen. “stop splashing jesus”….hilarious!

  8. The Fran
    The Fran
    November 9, 2011, 3:14 am | # | Reply

    I’m a Christian and I find this funny.

    • Trolle Rolle
      Trolle Rolle
      November 13, 2011, 8:01 am | # | Reply

      I’m Johnny and I find this funny

  9. Vorgex
    Vorgex
    November 9, 2011, 3:37 am | # | Reply

    Panel 3 is hilarious. “Honey, stop splashing Jesus”, haha!
    But if God is so pissed at Jesus for taking years to resurrect, maybe he should’ve helped him. He IS omnipotent after all, right?
    Well, screw it. I don’t give a flying fart about the platypus on the clouds. ^^

  10. Alessandro
    Alessandro
    November 9, 2011, 5:55 am | # | Reply

    I’m not saying that you shouldn’t make fun of religious subjects per se, but I am a bit uncomfortable with this strip.
    I really appreciate your talent, but an internet audience is typically a self-restricting one. A feedback loop could send you into gradually catering only to atheists. The last panel says “I’m ignorant about religion, I don’t care, and that’s a plus”.
    Again, you have AMAZING talent.

    • D Wilson
      D Wilson
      November 9, 2011, 9:20 am | # | Reply

      I agree with that entirely. As someone who loves Jesus and worships Him, it makes me want to not come back to the site again (which maybe won’t bother anybody), but I love the comic. Just seems a shame to me but I suppose you just can’t please everyone all the time.

      • Cadier
        Cadier
        November 9, 2011, 2:59 pm | # | Reply

        Well, it’s not his fault that you are overly sensitive. If you’ll leave a webcomic forever because of one strip, it makes me think you’re on the verge of suicide considering how many makes people fun of religious themes on a daily basis. o.o That’s not really a way to live your life, is it? Abandon something because of one little thing. “Make on mistake and I’ll never forgive you.” I hope you get over it, anyway. Seriously, it’s just a comic. o_O Why don’t you react like this when he’s making fun of bears or whatever?

        • D Wilson
          D Wilson
          November 11, 2011, 6:16 am | # | Reply

          Because bears are cuddly, duh.

    • Frances
      Frances
      November 9, 2011, 1:43 pm | # | Reply

      I don’t think that will ever be a problem. Adam makes fun of absolutely EVERYTHING: religion, men, women, children, diseases, co-workers… You name it, he ridicules it. He doesn’t ‘pick’ on religion specifically.

    • Yekaterina
      Yekaterina
      November 10, 2011, 6:12 am | # | Reply

      Dude, you really remind me of this other religious group who hated when people made comics depicting their famous religious buddy. Oh, what on earth was this radical group that swore they’d kill the guy who drew the picture called?
      That’s right, you just yourself put christianity on the level of islam. Hope it didn’t hurt much when you fell off your high horse.

      • Steve No Joke
        Steve No Joke
        November 10, 2011, 7:07 am | # | Reply

        I WOULD point out that boycotting doesn’t equal murder, but I think you know that.

      • Alessandro
        Alessandro
        November 10, 2011, 7:10 am | # | Reply

        There is no such a thing as a switch: ON “It’s commendable to hurl crude, baseless jokes against Jesus”; OFF “Everyone who dares to disrespect Jesus or Prophet X should be publicly stoned”.
        Criticizing something (and very mildly, as I did) is in an entirely different league from demanding bans or punishments for published works.
        Many Muslims follow the example of Muhammad, who had satirists killed for mocking him.
        As a Christian, instead, I’m pointing out that some jokes make me uncomfortable about enjoying an artistic expression.
        It’s never about disrespect. I’m not requiring a form of “respect”; of course cartoonists are making a living out of being irreverent.
        It’s about the subtext, which is often based on prejudices. For instance, one thing would be mocking Johan of Arc for what she did. A completely different (and disturbing) thing would be using her as an example of “all Christians being violent warmongers who hear voices”. Hinting subtly to such an allegation through a funny joke is not lighthearted and harmless, on the contrary, it’s piling on the prejudice: your defenses are down, you absorb more than if you were taking it seriously.

        Again, this is not about forbidding something, the whole point is trying to help people to understand the subtext and suggesting authors to be less adherent to a cliché of being careless and going with the flow (and we all know that mocking Christianity is fashionable). Suggesting: to invite someone to do things that in the view of the writer are more durable and catering to a larger public, instead of getting content with the juvenile cheers of know-it-all atheists, eventually a small clique.

        In the present strip, one is left wondering: what is the frame of reference? One where Jesus is re-resurrecting again and again??? What’s the point of that? Saying that somehow he’s getting old and weak is a poor shot, but at least it’s based on the idea of transposing human traits and failures to him; anyway, the side jokes derived from it are funny. But a re-resurrection with a tombstone, à-la-zombie? This distracts me, reader, with the idea that you don’t get the gist of resurrection and you don’t care. Plus, the Buddhists being better at it? What sort of situation is this? One is required to project himself in a parallel reality, where all the religions are equally true, sort of, but their content is really sketchy… the whole thing is not consistent and unsophisticated.
        I’m writing all of this because I love Bug and I want it to succeed even more.

        • Doc
          Doc
          November 10, 2011, 9:10 am | # | Reply

          It’s fashionable to mock Christianity because a.) it’s absurd and b.) people like you who have lost your sense of humor because of it. Analyzing the comic as if it assumes Christianity is true and misinterprets scripture? Are you serious?

        • Deen
          Deen
          November 11, 2011, 9:42 am | # | Reply

          I agree with Alessandro. It has become the fashion to mock Christianity, especially because anyone who says, “You know, that made me feel uncomforable” is chastized as being too sensitive or just can’t take a joke.

          So a person remarks to the artist that a subject made him/her uncomfortable (in a straight-forward, non-aggressive manner) and it becomes open season on his/her beliefs. Now ask yourself, how many other topics do we treat like this?

          So you disagree; that’s your right and your belief. But acknowledge that I have the right to my beliefs, and we can agree to respect the differences.

        • GreedyRadish
          GreedyRadish
          November 14, 2011, 3:55 pm | # | Reply

          While I do appreciate the point you are trying to make Alessandro, you should also remember that not everyone follows your system of beliefs. There ARE different belief systems than the one you chose and the people who follow those other belief systems believe just as firmly that they are right and YOU are wrong.
          I know this is sort of detracting from your point that the subtext is anti-Christian, but in all honesty this strip puts a light-hearted spin on what is usually perceived as a very stuffy and boring religion (at least where I’m from).
          I also understand that many people do not enjoy any mockery of their religion whatsoever as they feel it undermines their belief system, and it may cause them to question their faith (which in my personal experience has always been a big no-no when it comes to religion ie. “You do what God wills because he wills it, stop asking questions”).
          And finally, I do not believe the last panel reflects Adam’s intelligence in any sort of negative way. First of all, the entire strip should be viewed from a surrealist perspective, as obviously Jesus is not a Bug in the first place. Second, I don’t know how many of these strips you have read but the subject-matter found herein includes such obviously implausible topics as:
          -A man(Bug) gaining dust-based super powers from a vacuum cleaner.
          -Modern-day Vikings and how you can become one.
          -Zombies (Including, but not limited to: your boss being a zombie, your friends being zombies, cops being eaten by zombies, etc.)
          -Being peer-pressured into smoking by a young ballerina
          so, I guess my point here would be that this fits right in that vein. It is silly, and nonsensical, and no reasonable human being would take it as fact. You should enjoy the strip for what it is; a daily series of pictures with words that are designed with the purpose of tickling your funny bone and inciting a chuckle. I do not think I should have to explain to someone as intelligent as you (seemingly) are that the topics and ideas discussed in these comics are meant almost exclusively to be funny. This is not a forum to slander someone’s beliefs, nor is it a soapbox from which to complain about your poor, woebegone religion and how “everyone keeps making fun of me, mom! I don’t like them!”
          TL;DR this is a comic strip based in an alternate Universe and meant for comedic purposes. Stop being so uptight about your beliefs and just laugh at the funny bits.

          P.S. Adam, I always enjoy reading these. They bring a smile to my face every day. Keep up the great work!

      • ninelen
        ninelen
        November 11, 2011, 2:33 am | # | Reply

        I would just like to give my two cents to this and say that putting Christianity “on the level of Islam” shouldn’t really be used like a religious slur. Islam is not better or worse than Christianity.

  11. Fat Bug
    Fat Bug
    November 9, 2011, 6:12 am | # | Reply

    What kind of food is served at a party catering only to atheists? I assume shellfish and pork won’t be a problem.

    • Joreal
      Joreal
      November 9, 2011, 9:03 pm | # | Reply

      Well, there are people with shellfish allergies out there.

  12. Dave Dell
    Dave Dell
    November 9, 2011, 6:15 am | # | Reply

    That’s right. He’s ignorant about religion. Jesus changed his mind after 40 hours, not three days.

  13. Nebulous
    Nebulous
    November 9, 2011, 7:09 am | # | Reply

    But Buddhists don’t resurrect, they reincarnate. It’s totally different.
    Jesus comes back as himself, Buddhists come back as someone/something else.
    @Dave Dell:
    Yes it was only 40ish hours, but the Scriptural commentary says “On the third day he rose again.” Friday the 1st he died, Saturday the 2nd he was dead, and he came back on Sunday the third. *shrug*

    • Rhea
      Rhea
      November 9, 2011, 11:18 am | # | Reply

      Can’t help thinking of someone else’s cartoon in which Jesus is pouring himself a cup of coffee and muttering, “Man, I feel like I’ve been dead for three days….”

      • Gray
        Gray
        November 9, 2011, 11:35 pm | # | Reply

        You’re thinking of Farside, Rhea.

  14. Some guy
    Some guy
    November 9, 2011, 7:17 am | # | Reply

    Last panel is pure gold. No, screw gold. It’s DIAMONDS.

  15. That Chick
    That Chick
    November 9, 2011, 8:21 am | # | Reply

    I swear your comics with God & Jesus are the funniest in my opinion. You go where others would be too scared to and you ride that line between offensive and hilarious so well. Keep up the good work!

    • turlte19_92
      turlte19_92
      November 9, 2011, 1:32 pm | # | Reply

      I TOTALLY AGREE!!!!! especially when he throws in anti-christ bug. thats why i love this comic. t caters to the people who want the boundaries pushed and to read something that borders on extreme offensiveness, but still manages to keep it respectable

  16. Dave Dell
    Dave Dell
    November 9, 2011, 8:42 am | # | Reply

    Nebulous – Duh. Yet, the gospels of Mark and John don’t agree on the day or time of day he was executed.

    Still, the strip is hilarious. Almost as funny as the Jesus on a road trip strip where Jesus says to his dad, “You’re not the boss of me.”, and freaks out about the telephone poles looking like crosses.

    • Some guy
      Some guy
      November 9, 2011, 9:14 am | # | Reply

      I just realized this strip has been portraying God and Jesus as bugs this whole time. Bugs! I’m not Christian, so I don’t really give a poop, but somebody should be insulted.

  17. williamkattwilliams
    williamkattwilliams
    November 9, 2011, 9:43 am | # | Reply

    Oh yeah? Oh yeah?? Well I’m offended by the unauthorized use of a DC Comics catchphrase, and without the concomitant thunderbolt to boot! I’m deeply offended by the morally repugnant, excessive use of ellipses in panels 3 and 4… and I’m also offended by people who get offended!

    • VaguelyCreepy
      VaguelyCreepy
      May 26, 2013, 6:34 am | # | Reply

      That last part seems like an unfortunately self-perpetuating stance.

      • VaguelyCreepy
        VaguelyCreepy
        May 26, 2013, 6:35 am | # | Reply

        … And by attempting to extend the joke, I have instead killed it. Terribly sorry about that.

  18. Jim
    Jim
    November 9, 2011, 9:56 am | # | Reply

    Why does the title remind me of that old guy from the Simpsons who dropped his pants and sang “Old Gray Mare”?

  19. MrSnow
    MrSnow
    November 9, 2011, 12:37 pm | # | Reply

    hahaha its not even a wave >_____<

  20. surtursbane
    surtursbane
    November 9, 2011, 12:42 pm | # | Reply

    Hooray blasphemy! Zombie Jesus wants your soul!

  21. Kallie
    Kallie
    November 9, 2011, 6:22 pm | # | Reply

    Hey, Adam, have you ever considered adding searchable tags to your comics? It’s just that, I see people referencing prior comics a lot, and since you’ve done so many, it would be easier to find them with tags. Plus, a lot of times I’ll want to show a friend a specific comic, but not remember the name, and it’ll take a while to find it. I know that would be a lot of work to do, especially going back through the archives and tagging them, and I don’t know if/how it would work with your current webhost, but I was just wondering.

    • Adam
      Adam
      November 9, 2011, 9:48 pm | # | Reply

      Yeah, I’ve been considering that. I may make that a project in the future.

    • williamkattwilliams
      williamkattwilliams
      November 9, 2011, 10:08 pm | # | Reply

      If you’re unaware of it, here’s a crowd-based, host-independent option:

      ohnorobot.com/letsbefriends.pl

  22. Iforwhat
    Iforwhat
    November 9, 2011, 7:02 pm | # | Reply

    I’m Christian and I must say I’m insulted. Jesus only gets a tombstone?

  23. Tetris
    Tetris
    November 10, 2011, 7:06 am | # | Reply

    There’s offensive. And then there’s “offensive, but who cares, because it is simultaneously hilarious!” This comic belongs to the second category for me (depends on your sense of humor, obviously).

    Also, I find fellow Christians’ complaints that “somebody dared to make a joke involving Jesus and that’s so mean and offensive and evil!” far more insulting than jokes involving Jesus. But then again, I’m weird.

  24. Syvanis
    Syvanis
    November 10, 2011, 7:28 pm | # | Reply

    I don’t see what folks are upset about. There is nothing sacrilegious about this. Honestly, I think if Jesus exists he would find this funny.

    Super Funny comic keep it coming!

  25. Jay
    Jay
    November 20, 2011, 2:44 pm | # | Reply

    Hell will be fun. I’ll save you a seat.

  26. Clobbered and Irked
    Clobbered and Irked
    November 27, 2011, 2:26 am | # | Reply

    I’m a devout Catholic and I just copied this comic to my desktop to enjoy later. It isn’t blasphemous or anything (twisting or misconstruing particular beleifs). It is a “what if…” whimsical thought concept followed through to it’s most absurd (thus funny) end.This comic would make G.K. Chesterton smile. I’m positive. He was a hardcore devout Christian with a wickedly awesome sense of humor! (google “Chesterton quotes”) Besides, when I read the strip, I think I heard Jesus laugh. Nah, I KNOW I did. 🙂

  27. Iforwhat
    Iforwhat
    December 16, 2011, 11:58 am | # | Reply

    I love how many religious debates go on after reading a web comic, I think that there is one god but he has many names and, therefore I take all religions with the same tone, even polytheism ( the worship of two or more gods in a single religion) is seen as a potential truth. The only ones I don’t follow are very exotic, like African tribal ritual, or are inhumane.

  28. Renraw Okkay
    Renraw Okkay
    May 14, 2017, 12:12 am | # | Reply

    Maybe *that’s* why He doesn’t perform obvious, immediate, no-plausible-scientific-explanation miracles anymore…

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