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Two Balls, No Strikes

Two Balls, No Strikes

by Adam on October 20, 2014 at 12:00 am
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Discussion (19) ¬

    • A Nutcracker Suite | This Is
      October 22, 2014, 6:22 am | #
  1. TaishiEA
    TaishiEA
    October 20, 2014, 12:23 am | # | Reply

    now that i think about it i too do not remember the last time it had occurred, then again it could be that the blinding pain of such an event would make one not remember

  2. Rheywas
    Rheywas
    October 20, 2014, 12:58 am | # | Reply

    It is kind of good that the nut-cracking potential and age are inversely proportional. You know… For reproduction purposes.

  3. Thorbjørn
    Thorbjørn
    October 20, 2014, 1:08 am | # | Reply

    Try having kids – they bring back the nut cracking.

    – Oooff!

    • Jon
      Jon
      October 20, 2014, 7:21 am | # | Reply

      Agreed – they are just the right height to score a direct hit…

  4. Ultimate Yes America 6-5000: The Movie
    Ultimate Yes America 6-5000: The Movie
    October 20, 2014, 2:31 am | # | Reply

    Adam Sandler movies, especially now, are made up of two things; nut smashing, and vomit. Both the characters and the audience vomit, but for different reasons…

  5. Mahnarch
    Mahnarch
    October 20, 2014, 2:33 am | # | Reply

    Hmm. Hadn’t thought about it until now.

    I’ve had two full decades of clear living but, now you’ve jinxed me. I’ll be walking around on full alert.

  6. AckAckAck
    AckAckAck
    October 20, 2014, 3:55 am | # | Reply

    Ah yes, the current Adam Sandler movies. I remember when a local cable channel decided to run an Adam Sandler movie marathon and they put Jack and Jill repeatedly for a week. People told me that that movie was a painfully terrible, I decided to watch it for fun.

    There’s two conclusions I made after watching that movie:

    1) That movie is like a badly made direct to video movie.

    2)Watching it is like having your balls slammed with an oar repeatedly and PAINFULLY.

    That movie was so painfully horrible I can’t even laugh at it.

  7. Barlakopofai
    Barlakopofai
    October 20, 2014, 6:27 am | # | Reply

    I never got decked in the dick ever :/ I don’t even know if it hurts that bad

    • YouDolt
      YouDolt
      October 20, 2014, 7:32 am | # | Reply

      The dick is not so bad, but the balls… that’s a world of hurt. Sometimes you get lucky and the hit doesn’t hurt for some reason, but mostly you’ll fall down on the floor cursing.

  8. Deen
    Deen
    October 20, 2014, 9:20 am | # | Reply

    So glad I don’t have this worry. But just gotta say… love lumberjack bug!

  9. John
    John
    October 20, 2014, 9:42 am | # | Reply

    I handed mine over on the wedding day, soooo ….

  10. Rhea
    Rhea
    October 20, 2014, 10:19 am | # | Reply

    Being female, it’s not an issue, but I used to see the very end of America’s Funniest Home Videos once in a while, and I learned that men should never get anywhere near a piñata. Those blindfolded kids seem to hit the same target every time.

    • Mahnarch
      Mahnarch
      October 20, 2014, 5:28 pm | # | Reply

      I KNEW IT!! I KNEW IT!!!!!!

      Women DON’T feel the same thing as men!!!

      SUCK IT, MOM!! [for lying to me all those years]

  11. Ian Osmond
    Ian Osmond
    October 20, 2014, 11:02 am | # | Reply

    Tomorrow, your drawing table is going to collapse on your lap. It’s just going to happen. I’m sorry.

    • Adam
      Adam
      October 20, 2014, 5:28 pm | # | Reply

      Gah! You’re right!

    • Mahnarch
      Mahnarch
      October 20, 2014, 5:44 pm | # | Reply

      Jinx!!

      *points at Ian*

  12. YourWeirdUncle
    YourWeirdUncle
    October 21, 2014, 3:03 pm | # | Reply

    Ride certain roller coasters with T-bar lap restraints, and you’ll get your balls squished when the ride operators come by to “test*” the restraints.

    *Test how much pressure your balls can take before you pass out.

  13. AstralCat
    AstralCat
    November 28, 2021, 4:09 pm | # | Reply

    I don’t have to deal with this, but I can say that getting hit in the boob with a basketball hurts about the same.

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